With the new year approaching, you’ve likely found yourself in a stage of introspection. For many, this time of year prompts us to reflect on our goals, our habits and our very sense of self—with questions like “What will I change?” and “What will my goals be?” circling inside our minds.
But one question you may not have considered to ask is “What do I actually like?” It’s a simple question that, at face value, may not carry much weight. Yet, in the digital age, many of us might have a difficult time answering it.
Social media has become inseparable from our routines, so much so that we—often unknowingly—dedicate hours of our days to scrolling through our Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and Twitter timelines. In doing so, have we lost touch with the tangible, real-world activities that brought us joy prior to our discovery of social media? This is a reality that many of us may be hesitant to face.
However, if you consider a break from social media entirely—by deleting these apps off your phone for at least a week—you’ll likely face this reality head-on. If you choose to try this “digital detox,” here are three things you might notice if it’s your first time.
1. There Are Empty Spaces In Our Lives That Social Media Fills
Once you delete social media apps from your phone and commit to a set detox period, the first and most immediate thing you’ll notice is just how much time social media occupies in your day. You may instinctively grab your phone to check your messages or scroll your timeline, only to be reminded that you’ve deleted them—and that you’ll have to find something else to do.
If it’s your first detox, you’ll likely do this a few times before reality sets in—because screens, as mentioned, are ingrained in our habits and routines. According to global 2023 surveys, United States citizens spend an average of 7 hours and 3 minutes of their days on screen time—and this certainly isn’t without consequences.
A 2019 study from the International Journal of Mental Health and Addiction notes that there are an abundance of negative outcomes associated with excessive screen time—such as cognitive decline, slowed learning, lowered self-esteem and increased severity of mental health symptoms. Notably, this study defined “excessive” screen time as anything upwards of 2-3 hours per day.
Detoxing from digital devices brings a jarring realization: without it, there are vast, empty spaces in our lives. We spend almost 45% of our waking hours on our screens—nearly half our days, excluding sleep. When you force yourself to break away from this habit, you may notice things that you were previously happy to ignore, or could otherwise pacify: silence, boredom and the echoing question, “Well, what should I do now?”
2. Social Media Distracts You From What You Actually Like
The overwhelming amount of free time you’ll find without social media forces you to confront the question, “What do I actually like?” For many, the natural first step in this position would be to return to old or neglected hobbies—be it reading, music or arts and crafts. However, in revisiting them, you might quickly notice the aforementioned effects of slowed learning and cognitive decline. That is, these hobbies might not feel as easy or rewarding as they once felt to you.
Findings from a 2016 study from Computers in Human Behavior puts this realization into perspective. Anhedonia—namely, the loss of pleasure in activities or hobbies that were once enjoyable—was found to be strongly related to internet addiction and excessive screen time. Thus, it’s highly plausible that internet addiction could reinforce or even deepen anhedonia.
We often fail to realize how much social media and the internet engage our brains’ reward system. It does so in a way that is both immediate and shallow: it provides short bursts of pleasure that don’t require much engagement or effort. If you, like many, engage in excessive screen time, a digital detox can highlight how much you’ve become dependent on the instant gratification that screens provide. Over time, this addiction can make other activities—most especially ones that require patience and effort—seem less rewarding.
Reading a long book, attempting to play music that you once knew by heart or working on a finicky knitting or woodworking project may feel tedious or even boring. After initially retrying these hobbies, you may, again, instinctively take a break and grab your phone—as what you normally do online may feel more rewarding than your old, offline hobbies.
Importantly, this isn’t a reflection on the hobbies themselves, nor on you. Simply, the more we rely on online activities for quick dopamine hits, the harder it becomes to find joy in offline experiences—even if you know for a fact that these are hobbies that once were a great source of joy to you. The reality is that social media distracts us from what we actually enjoy; it’s easier to scroll with one finger for immediate rewards than to use both hands for something that will be more rewarding in the long run.
3. You Can Live Without It
The first few days of digital detoxing and reconnecting with old hobbies will be challenging; there will be moments of boredom, silence and frustration that will be hard to ignore. But, if you stick with it, there will come a moment when you finish the book, complete the knitting project or wrap up that creative piece, and realize you didn’t habitually check your phone. You’ll have sat with nothing but your thoughts and what’s in front of you and realized that the question “What do I actually like?” has a clear answer—once you’re comfortable living without constant distractions.
Of course, it’s impractical to remove screens or social media from our lives entirely; for many, our work and relationships depend on them. That said, our free time can be spent better than laying down and scrolling for hours on end—and a digital detox is the best way to realize this, as well as reap other benefits. Beyond reconnecting with old hobbies, a 2020 study notes that digital detoxes can also offer improved sleep, reduced anxiety and an overall positive change in mood.
Once your detox period is over, there’s no need to outright deny yourself the pleasure of checking in on your friends’ social media pages or watching funny videos. However, recognizing that you can live without seven hours of screen time a day reminds you how much life there is to live—even just in one day. Once you’re comfortable without it, you’ll start seeing those vast, empty spaces in a new light: as room to improve, space to grow and an opportunity for you to find joy in everything else life has to offer.
Do you have an unhealthy relationship with social media? Take this science-backed test to find out if you have a “doomscrolling” problem: Doomscrolling Scale
